This blog post has been the one I have been dreading. I am writing it from home, back in the United States, 5 days after leaving Uganda. The problem is...my heart is still in Africa. For some reason it didn't get on that plane with me at 9 am Wednesday August 3rd. I really felt at home in Uganda and like I was where I was meant to be. Now I am facing the challenges of learning how to be the me 30 some days ago that was still happy to be in Colorado.
The last few days in Uganda were nothing short of perfect. We got to do our shopping at the craft market on Sunday. Then on Monday we hung out at the school and then took the 3rd through 5th graders to a rec center to go swimming. It was so awesome to get to have so much fun with the kids. Tuesday was the last day of projects and I went to the farm. It was the opening ceremony for the 6 new students who will be taking part in the year long vocational training program of Farming God's Way. It was just the perfect way to end the month by getting to feel rewarded for all of the hard work we put into the farm and to be an inspiration to the men who were about to start a really hard but useful year in their lives. Tuesday night was very emotional, I think we all realized how used to this place we had gotten and to each other. Let me say, I miss the 20 people we spent the last month with like no other. They really became a family to me and are such huge support systems. I have never been challenged more in my faith and vulnerability as I did this month. These people make me want to strive to be a better person. We left early Wednesday morning, the taxi picked us up at 6 am to take us to the airport. Of course, like the crazy unbelievable people they are, Alese and Jer rode all the way to the airport to see us off. I got pretty teary saying bye to them, even though I'll see them in a week. So we successfully made it from Uganda to London, spent a night in London and just kind of relaxed. Upon return to the London airport, planning on being home in 10 hours we learned that they overbooked our flight almost double. Of course, we didn't get on it so they sent 4 of us to Seattle, we had another overnight there, and finally got home around 11 am on Friday. I was very excited to be home and see everyone, don't get me wrong, but the entire time had the people and things I left in Uganda in the back of my mind. Dan was at the baggage claim in the airport to pick me up and I got butterflies getting to see him. Since then I have been extremely busy. I've fit in a few coffee dates, dinner dates every night, just running around like crazy. I have loved seeing everyone back home, but I have struggled to really feel like I can share the experiences I had. Everyone asks, "how was Africa?!". To me, that is the most broad question that can be asked, that really doesn't have a fast easy answer. I have tried just saying it was really really good, I am ready to go back. My friend told me to come up with 3 words to describe my trip when people ask that question, so that if they are really interested to know they will ask further, or they will leave it at that. I have started saying it was "really challenging, but awesomely life changing." I really think that sums it up.
I am a different person. I have seen and felt things I never thought was possible. I have felt a love and passion for strangers, it could be considered creepy. I was forced to open myself up and be vulnerable to extremes that don't even exist in the States. And the hardest thing, not one person will ever fully be able to relate to me. Yes, I have a ton of people in my life that were on this trip with me or have done similar things, but no person has the exact same experience. We all had different emotions to the same situations. I poured all of me out in one month and left a good portion of me in Africa. I am praying praying for God to fill me back up again and help me to find a way to bring this experience to life somehow here at home. I don't want to just feel like I'm serving each time I travel to Uganda, but I want to find something here that will even remotely give me the same feeling of serving and loving. I was rocked to pieces by God and I think I am going to just continue to be rocked and broken by Him. I was told in this month to "keep walking" and that's exactly what I'm going to do. Love until it hurts and then love some more.
